Schengen Visa query for my trip
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If you ask for a two-entry visa and additional days and don't explain why in your application, then there's a large chance you won't get it.
Furthermore there is no reason you would need to hide the further plans from the consulate. Disclosing those plans don't make any (legal or moral) obligation for you to actually take that part of the trip.
You should apply to the French consulate, describe your itinerary for the entire trip you have in mind, and enclose a free-form explanation saying something like:
France is the main destination for this trip, because that is the family vacation that brings me to Europe in the first place. [Reference other family members' applications here]. Even though the proposed stay in the Netherlands is longer, I'm going there alone as a personal extension to the trip for the purpose of [...fill in here ...], and I may yet decide to cancel that part.
Therefore, if you cannot issue a visa that covers the Netherlands part of my trip, please consider issuing a single-entry visa that covers only my family vacation to Paris.
With everything above board, there will be no question of deception or consulate shopping.
Remember that the "longest duration of stay" rule is only a fallback rule that applies if there is no other reason to consider any country your main destination. Here you have an impeccable reason why France is your main destination, so there is no reason to play games.
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Source: stackoverflow.com
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