What happens if an arriving passenger into the US/Canada assaults a border officer?

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It certainly depends on the mood of the officer he swears to or threatens, but with high probability, they have a low threshold, and it is a felony.
He can expect arrest, some nights in detention, with a conviction (probably on parole), deportation, and a multi-year ban for the country. Nobody wants people with this attitude.
This could also (negatively) influence getting visas for other countries.

I am aware that for many brits, a sentence without 'bloody' is syntactically incomplete, but he should try to adjust to other cultures a bit, before he has to learn the hard way. Just shutting up will go a long way; he is allowed to think what he wants.

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